Because of a difficulty with the “jail mail”, I was not able to receive Cydney’s blog entry for this week. After discussing it with her on the phone, she thought it was a good idea to share with you an excerpt from a letter she sent last week. The writing pertains to her relationship with her brother. Her addiction has brought turmoil to this relationship and in the light of day and sobriety, she sees the damage it has done not only to her relationship with her brother but her own life as well.
Cydney would like me to preface this entry by reminding everyone that she is not a religious person, but a spiritual one. Instead of this sounding like a push for any one religion, she would simply like to urge anyone struggling with addiction to find their connection to their own understanding of spirituality. Cydney has never lost this connection, but simply misplaced it for awhile. She has always identified equally as much with the Catholic/Christian bible teaching as she has with the philosophy of Buddha. “Find your way and keep your spiritual life healthy” is Cydney’s message to you all!
“This is an excerpt from a letter to my mom, sent last week, hoping that my brother would be receptive.
“Those who love their brother, remain in the light”. 1 John 2:3-11
“The old commandment is the word you have heard and yet I do write a new commandment to you, which holds true in him and among you, for the darkness is passing away and the true light is already shining.
Whoever says he is in the light yet hates his brother, is still in the darkness. Whoever loves his brother remains in the light and there is nothing in him to cause a fall. Whoever hates his brother is in darkness; he walks in darkness and does not know where he is going because the darkness has blinded his eyes. This is the word of the lord.”
Although I am sure the use of the word “brother” is meant to mean all of mankind, for me it means my actual brother. I want to dedicate this verse to him. I love you little brother!
Let us love each other so we can both walk in the light together , with our parents and family. Please forgive me for my past so I can be part of your future. I need you in my life and I hope you need me in yours. Although we are both Scorpio and can separate easily from people who have harmed us, I know your heart matches mine. We love to be close to our family and it is a bond that can never be broken for us.
Good luck in your upcoming adventure. I know we won’t see each other and probably not get a chance to talk before you leave. But please know that the goodness in me that has always been with you, will be with you in spirit and know that I once was blind, but now I see.”
I’ve asked my brother to write back to me. I haven’t yet received a letter and not really holding my breath, even though my mom says he has responded. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is he knows. I will move forward and keep becoming the sister he deserves.